A Promotion For Your Dad

“Dramatic Irony- Its always going to fuck with you.”
So the best movie of the year, so far, in my opinion, (as if that needs to be added) is Stranger Than Fiction. I haven’t seen a movie that is such a combination of acting, script, visually arresting presentation and superbly deep themes since Eternal Sunshine and before that Fight Club. This film exhilirated me. It tells the story of a man who starts to hear voices and that is all you need to know. I could waffle endlessly about postmodernism and the conquest of distance over time and especially the Incarnation but I won’t do it now because:

    I don’t want to torment you
    I will one day be a post-grad divinity student and I need to save it up for then.

If my glowing and visibly excited response isn’t enough for you, remember that Maggie Gyllenhaal is in it. Perceptive readers of Zoomtard know that she is up there with Jennifer Garner as the most zoomjectified woman in the world. Did you like how I made a flimsy joke out of my lechery by changing objectify to zoomjectify so as to obscure the creepiness of it all? You can’t learn that kind of skill at seminary. You hear that Jaybercrow? Seminary isn’t going to help you.

Come on! Let’s boogey to the elf dance!
Amongst the finest birthday gifts I got this year (and there were many classics) was the Songs For Christmas Singalong by Sufjan Stevens. The first three EPs of this 5-disc set were made available online 2 years ago but now he has gathered all the Christmas songs together in one box with a cartoon, some stickers, the chords for the songs, a video and 3 essays. It is quite the spectacular presentation.

sufjan-cartoon, originally uploaded by Zoomtard.

I love the essays that come with it. In one, Santa Sufjan writes,

It [Christmas music] intersects a supernatural phenomenon (the incarnation of God) with the sentimental mush of our mortal lives (presents, toys, Christmas tree ornaments, snow globes, cranberry sauce), leaving in its pathological wake a particular state of mind one can only describe as “that warm, fuzzy feeling.”


And at the very center of the universe I saw the Christ Child, an infant baby, helplessy crying, wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in the manger, trembling and suckling and cooing and burping and crying and laughing and giggling and spitting up breast milk all over the place. This was the mysterious incarnation of God, who came to Planet Earth not as a Divine Warrior, or a Supernatural Sorcerer or an Army of Alien Androids, but as a helpless newborn baby, probably not much bigger than a six pack of acrylic tube socks. Or maybe a twelve pack…

…to consider the immeasurable gift of life, the incarnation of God, the Christ Child, a newborn baby, lying in a manger, wrapped in swaddling clothes, who would conquer the world not with brute force, but with love.

I know I can’t say it better or more interestingly than that. Let us pray that IVP publish a book by Sufjan in 2007!

Links hold the chain of the Internet around your neck
Do Copenhagen have their annual Top 50 music videos up for 2006, all with videos available to enjoy via the wonder of You Tube.

Stephen Williams and David Livingstone, two brainy academics up there in Queens University put on a series of lectures for the Christian Institute, the big wig brainy section of the PCI. (I work for the PCI). The lectures are called 20th Century Voices and they discuss the effect that people like Foucault, Said, Kuhn and Kafka have had on how we view life. Those are topics we all need to be familiar with so that we can have interesting dinner conversations in ten years when we have settled for suburbian humdrummery and we need to act clever at the party you host to bring some sparkle to the tedium we call life. So take the opportunity to hear these talks now!

An excellect game to pass a minute or two: how many countries can you identify on the world map. I got 65 when I played. I don’t know if that is good until I hear what you scored!

Your Correspondent, Edited By Neuro For Awfulness

16 Responses to “A Promotion For Your Dad”

  1. Steven says:

    I got 60

    Surprisingly good on Central Aisan states and less so on African ones

  2. Amy says:

    eastern europe never was my strong point. not telling until i’ve practiced some more!

  3. Lana says:

    In some subconscious effort to make you feel smarter, I just got a 27.

  4. zoomtard says:

    Darn it Lana, I feel better already. The key to success is to have spent plenty of time in the Russian states or have friends from there. Then you can tell your Armenia from your Tajikistan without even thinking.

  5. 22. Couldn’t even find India for fucks sake.

  6. Dora the explorer says:

    Ha! Just got 83. Although that may be because I have been spending an inordinate amount of time on this website swatting up…….http://www.sheppardsoftware.com/Geography.htm.
    Warning, highly addictive.

  7. neuro-praxis says:

    Nobody worry! I got 15! That is not a joke!

  8. Lana says:

    I just retook this and somehow got a 12. This is what I get for doing anything other than writing in Greek during finals week.

  9. O.G says:

    Who knew Eritrea was an actual place?! I thought it was a viral infection…

  10. ACDublin says:

    71… Then 63, then 47, then 31… poses as an innocent web game but actually assimilates and steals your brain.

    Love this website, zoomtard Glad to hear there’s some people out there who still think Tom Wright has not walked the plank into the Sea of Heresy. At UTC our plank simply isn’t sufficiently wide to drown all the witches we keep hunting… Can you swim, Eugene, can you? What about you, Piper? You’ll be in too, Driscoll if you don’t stop all that culture talk.

  11. zoomtard says:

    Everyone who isn’t ACDublin should just back away for a moment while I welcome one of the major people who get the blame for me being a Christian to Zoomtard:

    I wouldn’t dump Driscoll in there ACD(C). But I would be happy to beat him (oh the irony) for his offensive tone. I think Paul talked somewhere about saying things that are right but still ending up being totally wrong… but I am sure paraphrasing Paul would have me on the plank as well.

    I am surprised actually that you would speak of UTC so openly. Everyone else seems dead set on convincing me it is a bastion of free thought, diversity and sincere joyful worship!

  12. jimlad says:

    Forty six, but the computer was mistaken about a few of them. Due to a strange quantum anomaly, the names of several countries were switched just as I pressed the buttons. Then they switched back to their preferred state just as the computer was deciding if I was right or wrong. Those are the breaks.

  13. ACDublin says:

    It’s great to be here, Zoomtard. Despite their shared surname, Rigorous Thinking and Fresh Thinking are uncommon bedfellows. You’ve been, however, a most able matchmaker!

    UTC is generally a great experience. Academically it’s ok (The Welshman makes it worth putting up with quite a lot of mediocrity) – the biggest benefits are studying with forty or so others who will be colleagues later on in life. And getting to hang out with undergrads and other postgrads. It’s been pretty stifling over the last month or so with the heresy brigade going to town on some well-respected writers (including NT) without reading a word of what they say. Integrity seems to be missing in it all!

  14. zoomtard says:

    I wish you’d write about that then AC. The idea that Tom Wright is trying to subvert the core of Christian doctrine seems to me to be an insanely paranoid idea… but seeing as the only theologians I have actually read enough of to have an opinion on are him and Bonhoeffer I guess I will have to trust the scaredycats when they say his tinkering sets us up for a beating.

    Now all I have to do is make enough time to write a new entry…. who wants to write my Christmas sermon? Jimlad? Babette? Someone!?