I fall asleep

Ah, Saturday morning. Savour the freedom of sleeping in, waking intermittently to the singing of the housemates as they try to perfect Christmas carols. Wait. Thats not to be savoured. Thats the kind of thing that makes one want to drill holes. In people. I hate all Christmas songs unless they are one of Ben Folds’ ultra cynical songs about the manslaughter of Santa or an alcoholic’s hatred of people and their happiness. I also have a fondness for the hardcore Classical stuff that makes you want to wear highly starched black suits and work in a choir full time. However, I am tone deaf. Those Christmas songs include all of Handel’s Messiah and O Holy Night.

An example of this kind of crap will be provided because I don’t want to make unsubstantiated claims. “The Story Has Broken” is a song written by Michael Perry. It has earned him a place on The List. Girls sing one line and boys sing another and listen to what Perry has them say:

Girls: “The story has broken, an angel has spoken and this is the token that Jesus is here: he comes as a stranger regardless of danger, the Lord in a manger, the babe without peer.”

Boys (remember simultaneously): “The sheperds returning and wisemen of learning their savior discerning, his praises will sing: as those who first saw him and knelt down before him, so let us adore him and worship our king”.

God, whether you believe in H/him or not is as a concept, a perfect Being who exists outside of time. As a result of that, theology tells us that He can’t get bored since that goes hand in hand with time. However, theology is wrong. When the housemates sing that crap tonight at a carol service at church, God will be bored and fall asleep. I fear what will happen to the universe then. In the immortal words of Samuel L. Jackson’s character in Jurassic Park, “Hang on to your butts”.

I stayed up preposterously late making chat with the girlfriend. She laid out her piercing roadmap for the next 18 months. Its the most exhaustative NP piercing plan in history. Soon she will be revolting to both our mothers, unsettlingly repellent to certain people in her church and more hot to herself. She is a bit worried about a tongue piercing becuase it can go horribly wrong and your ears can fall off or something like that. I got bored in the third hour of piercing conversation. I was trying to discuss marraige and infidelity and sexuality but it kept coming back to metal pokers in her skin.

One thing that I can’t believe is that the piercing culture so prevalent amongst my peers (well, not my direct circle of peers- Dublin Christians seem to believe that piercings are outlawed in Deuteronomy based on their occurance rate) happened relatively recently. It didn’t really happen until the 60s in western societies. Maybe my thesis can be “Piercing Truth: The Development of Self Mutilating Culture in Ireland”. That would rule. However, NP points out that its not self mutilation if someone helps you.

And on that note I will end this rambling.

Your Correspondent, Dictating Procrastination

One Response to “I fall asleep”

  1. phil says:

    Good work Kevin. I was going to go, but I was lured into Stillorgan by a certain P Donnan ( otherwise known as Paul D ), on the pretext of playing networked games. There, I’m sure it will gladden your heart to learn that we sorted out Peter Neill’s overheating computer. So it was a constructive evening. How were the carols in the end?